that scream that cannot escape

i keep losing important things.

despite the fact that they are materialistic items.

i cannot handle the fact that someone is touching them and placing them elsewhere.

my stomach hurts so badly tonight.
i wonder if it's the bottled emotions that i had for the week.
it's squirming but i want to push it down and it keeps coming back up stronger.

i want to scream but the knots in my guts are aching and all i can do i scrunch up and gurgle.

please make it stop...
i want it to go away...

"i was much happier before i met you"
i wish i could say that too.

i cant find my stuff.
just like how i cant find my place in the world.

its too big.
and i am too small.
and the rest of the items seems too small to be of any significant importance......