waiting for the world to change

sometimes you wonder what ever happened to the old person you used to be.

environment changes and people changes.
inevitably these changes get to you and you're changing too.
i miss the old me.
miss the one who could care less about what the world thinks about her.
miss the one who doesnt depend so much on other people.
miss the one who could keep smiling non stop and be happy.
miss the one didnt think studying and school mattered so much (not exactly a good thing)
miss the one who was a people's person
miss the one .. who was very very carefree.

but now.
i have become another person.
one who finds it hard to cope around people.
who thinks that every single fucker's thought on her matter.
i keep thinking so negatively i don know what is wrong with me anymore.
i cant keep friends around me.
cant click very well with guys. (not as well as i could)
and goddamnit my mindset on everything changed pretty big.

but then again.
now i love the Earth more (im a freaking conversationalist)
i know how to appreciate more people.
i am still trying to learn how to let go.
i know how to try make people happier *(cos of jie! :D)
know how to care and be simple (joeeyyy :D)
and many new things.

cos of the people around me.
and gosh im thankful for that.

although im still trying to adapt, at least i can try to make sure i love myself more. and hope that people will too. even though im still far from it.

need help.
but i know i will be stronger as time passes.
maybe i will lose friends here and there..
but as long as the one that matters stay beside me,
that's all that counts.